Normal seniors worry about if they will get rejected from their dream school, what they are going to wear to their last prom, or if it’s possible to stay close with the friends they grew up with after high school.
The memory still plagued me with nightmares, as I imagined it would for some time. One did not get their mind rewritten with fake memories, have the real ones reappear, and not feel traumatized by it. It was a fate that was almost worse. Some days I still battled with which emotion lingered from it: fear or anger.
Suddenly, I dropped to the grass below the curved driveway. My hands pressed into the ground as I tried to calm my breathing. It was only a matter of seconds before I felt the warmth of Liam’s hands on my face.
“Emma, love…look at me.”
My eyes lifted to his bright gaze of deep worry before he leaned his forehead against mine. He didn’t lecture me for ignoring his initial worry about staying in the room minutes ago. He merely sat patiently, letting me inhale his strength.
“I’m sorry…” I said almost breathlessly. “It’s just the memory of that day…”
I could hardly finish my sentence. Fear was climbing its way up, making a worthy competitor for the anger simmering below the surface.
“I hate that you’re still suffering,” Liam said with a slightly angry quiver to his voice that I had never heard before.
“Deciding to be with you always meant accepting the possibility of danger.”
I paused with a humorless exhale as my eyes zoned out of focus.
“But losing my memories of you is something I could never accept…not again.” I was attempting to hold back tears but I knew my effort was unsuccessful when Liam used his thumbs to wipe the wetness off my cheeks. “And yet I’m scared every day they will be.”
Liam stood, my body following like a magnet before his arms pulled me against him. I wrapped my arms tightly around him, turning my face into the warmth of his neck as he placed a kiss on the top of my head.
“I won’t let that happen,” Liam said.
I wasn’t sure how long we stood there before the silent sanctuary was disturbed.
“I never meant to hurt you, Ems.”
I stepped back from Liam as my neck turned at the unexpected voice I had known all my life. Suddenly, the fear was pulled down by the leg, making room for the anger to break free.
“And yet that’s all you did,” I said.
The twin serpent of anger had battled its way back to the surface, subduing the fear indefinitely. His timing was already misjudged and as soon as Sean attempted to reach forward with his own plea, I was lost to new fury.
“Ems, if you could just see it from—”
“Don’t!”
My voice had scared an animal resting in the high trunk of the tree to my left. Thankfully, I had no immortal strength to add to the anger, to prevent me from simply snapping the large oak tree in the yard of the Alexander Mansion.
“Just because we’re all dealing with Thomas doesn’t mean I’m ready to hear you explain. I can’t even stomach looking at you right now.”
“Just give her some space,” Liam advised.
“Once again, Liam, I don’t need your advice. I’m not the only one to—”
“Stop right there, Sean.” Both of them looked back at me. “You don’t get to blame him for your choices.”
“You were miserable!”
Sean stepped forward, gaining the inches toward me that I wished to avoid.
“I couldn’t stand by and watch you wither any longer. Not when I could take it all away.”
My throat felt as if it were closing in as I looked toward the ground. I couldn’t take the breaking of his voice any longer. I shook my head, backing away.
“That was my pain to have, my love to remember. And you just robbed my soul of it without a second’s thought.”
I glanced up to see Sean’s lips parting but no words came out. It was my moment to escape the conversation I could no longer bear.
“And yes, I will inevitably forgive you. Of course I will.”
His lips curved for a moment before dropping at the image he was already picturing from my mind.
“Yeah,” I said, nodding. “That moment of you in my room still haunts my dreams. I can still hear my pathetic pleas. So, yes, you will earn my forgiveness with time. It’s inevitable.” I shrugged, accepting my own truth. “But you will never be able to make me forget the betrayal of that day. Because your intentions left a mark. And I’ll carry that scar on my heart for the rest of my life."
I turned on my heel, heading back toward the mansion, leaving him behind as I fought back my tears in silent agony.
Bound, #2
Jennifer has studied Creative Writing and Literature and lives in Nashville, Tennessee. To find out more about her and her novels you can visit www.jenniferdean.net.
